Tonight I am feeling a little lost.
This blog started off as a way for me to record my journey with Master...all the highs and lows of me discovering my kink, becoming a collared submissive, the trials of a Long Distance Relationship and everything in between.
I have felt lost since being released (at my request) but in a totally different way tonight than from yesterday.
My writing in this blog has helped me at times in ways that only someone else who blogs will understand. It allows me to focus on the feelings I have, why I feel the way I do, why I DO the things I do and much more.
But I feel like I have begun a journey of my own, no longer WITH Master, but me....Sassy.
I have things I still want to write about, blog about, confess and admit to, but they no longer directly involve the person I began my journey with, and it feels disrespectful to Him to continue to blog about them here....where this was our home, the place we could leave the distance behind and just be Master and His kitty......and now I am Sassy...on a journey of my own.
I wonder now how a blog might work when I have come out from behind the screen, met people in person, had coffee, dinner, a kink event, I have messages sent to me that I would love to share and blog about, but now people actually know who I am...and more than likely, who I would talk about in my blog. And I feel odd even contemplating that. I would never share private things without asking permission from the other people involved, but it still feels odd.
Now I have more to think about....where do I write now???
A private blog?
A new blog?
Continue the old blog?
Not blog at all?
Only blog about what comes next in my un-finished journey with Master?
I have contemplated a private journal, but I love the comments, the other people who have a suggestion I may not have thought of, and the fact that someday a new submissive may stumble across my blog here and even if they learnt only one small thing through all we have been through, it is worth every typed word.
I just don't know what comes next for me in blogland....
I know how you feel about how much blogging helps. I am on a journey to try to get my husband to be a master (a tall order, I tell you!) and blogging helps a lot. But I also like to write about general D/s, sex, spanking, humor and anything else kinky that comes to mind.
ReplyDeleteI love to read comments from others on not only what might help with my own journey but also on all aspects of TTWD. And I agree if one sub, or especially in my case, someone who is trying to get their partner to become kinky, is helped even a little by reading my blog, it is worth it a thousand times over. So keep writing. Whatever comes to mind! And something will and it will be fulfilling. :)
Maybe changing the look of the blog would help. This path is a journey not a destination. When I share my blog with someone I always preface it with "this is me exposed, good, bad and ugly". Be proud of where you started and how you have grown.
ReplyDeleteGood luck deciding.
:) hugs
Sassy!! You are amazing and whether you continue to write here or some place else you have a story to tell. A story that will inspire someone else to go out on a limb and eventually share their story as well if you are lucky.
ReplyDeleteI do know where you are coming from with this though. I thought the same thing after my dilemma and realized that I had a right to keep it up. That was until a couple of weeks ago when I just couldn't keep it up after he came back in my life to be hostile with me. That's when I knew this part of me that he was still connected to had to close for good.
Everyday it hurts. Everyday it seems like I lost a major part of me. Something I need back. Something I want back. So do me a favor Sassy, don't lose this part of you for the world. You will feel all those things and more without this part of you. KEEP IT!!
xxx Miss July xxx
Awww Sassy, whatever you do, don't stop blogging! Flutterby's suggestion of a new look sound good - a sort of 'fresh start', marking a trun in your journey. I have, of course, experienced exactly the same thing but the other way around! No longer a lone voice. And, thank you so much for your comment, it was so sweet and kind, really. Hugs - and don't ever leave us Sassyless xxx
ReplyDeleteNo sudden moves.
ReplyDeleteWhen it's right, you'll know.
Meanwhile, keep posting, it's not disrespectful, it's the grieving part of ending a relationship, and that's your normal, and it's ok.
Make that turn, the new look...when you're obsessed with it. Then you'll know it's right.
Whatever you do...even if it's nothing...just be you.
That's what we all love and adore. And crave. And want to lick.
oopsie.
love and miss you, and be well baby.
kisses
z
You know I left my original blight for a similar reason, only to come back to ot when the time was right. You have unlimited options, but keep writing. It's a healthy outlet, and one I hope you continue to utilize.
ReplyDeletesg